Haha

A genie granted me one wish, so I wished to be happy.
Now I live with 6 dwarves and work in a mine.

When I was younger, I applied to medical school. During the entrance exam, we were asked to rearrange the letters PNEIS to form the name of an important human body part.
Those who answered SPINE are doctors today. The rest of us are here online playing board games .

Santa was having a bad day, the elves were on strike, 4 reindeer were missing and two were preggers, Mrs. claus was ragging and the pms was hellish. There was a knock at the door.
Santa opened the door and there was a young angel holding a pine tree. Angel: OK fat boy where do you wand me to stick this tree. and thus was started the tradition of the angel on top of the tree.

The teacher with 2 new kids...Young man what is your name? First boy...Snotty nose! Teacher...If you don't tell me your name I'm sending you home. The boy takes the brothers hand and says, come on poopy Britches, she won't believe you either.

Lol

A tip.... Don't run through the screen door so fast Grandma, you might strain yourself.

You got a token, stop complaining

I did a lot of work but keep your token, by the way, I had no Tom, Dick or Harry. Those names weren't off the top of my head, they were researched. End of discussion!

Nope. I'm open to other sources, but if they're names I've not heard of some evidence of where they came from might be useful.
Just saying Santa had 3 reindeer named Tom, Dick and Harry doesn't really cut it.

Naming 8 should be easy for anyone but if you want 2 tokens you need to do a little bit of work. I don't think that's too much to ask

Did that, didn't matter tho. I guess only your sources are the correct ones out there.

Why shouldn't you lend money to elves? They're always short

how much did santa pay for his sleigh??? nothing it was on the house... lol

Please note the names need to be specifically names of Santa's reindeer, not just general names for reindeer from books / films. The names I'm aware of are from a couple of very old sources

As you can see we have some wonderful Christmas tokens to give away.

For your chance to win one at random, please send me a private message with the names of at least eight of Santa's reindeers. Anyone who manages to name 20 or more will win two random tokens.

Please remember to send answers be PM, DO NOT post answers here

THANK YOU hoof hearted

There were lots of great jokes!

We have a winner!

For the last poll, Vote for you favourite Joke.
Congratulations to jroyster with his entry My wife thinks it's weird that I stare at the window during a heavy rainstorm. It would be a lot less weird if she'd just let me in.
Scoring an impressive % of the vote.
Look out for a winner's token on your profile soon!

Yes indeed!

Thanks!

That makes the poll a lot easier to vote on by posting them this way. Thank you.

In WWII, it’s said that before the Okinawa landings American servicemen told each other that it’s bad luck to be killed on a Friday.

During the D-day landings the Allies achieved air superiority.

German soldiers told each other the following.

“If a plane is silver colored it’s American. If it’s dark colored it’s British. And if it can’t be seen at all, it’s German”

Time to vote for your favourite joke from below

1. It's weird
My wife thinks it's weird that I stare at the window during a heavy rainstorm. It would be a lot less weird if she'd just let me in.

2. Morning Run
Every morning at breakfast for the past 6 months, I announce loudly to my family that I’m going for a jog, and then I don’t.
It’s my longest running joke of the year.

3. Freshly-minted news
Given the news yesterday (Nov 12) from the Philadelphia Mint, some of the current administration's policies make no cents.

4. Circus Tent
The Circus was in town. Lads who didn't have the price of admission stood outside the tent trying to look in. A passing businessman went to the ticket booth and said, "Let those boys in and count them."
Upon being told that the count was fourteen, the man said, "Shucks. Wrong again." And walked off.

5. Halloween joke
Stop buying plastic skeletons for Halloween. 🎃 It’s terrible for the environment.
Locally sourced, all natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly and cheaper. 💀 🦴

6. If a tree falls
If a tree falls on your ex in the woods, and no one's around to hear it, you should still get rid of the chainsaw.

7. Seagulls
Q. Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
A. If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels!

8. Fridge
Imagine if your fridge did what you do to it everyday. Every half hour it goes to your room opens the door, stares at you for 5 minutes, then leaves.

That joke was five months ago. I'll go with the latest one.

Every morning at breakfast for the past 6 months, I announce loudly to my family that I’m going for a jog, and then I don’t.
It’s my longest running joke of the year.

do you want to use that or the tree falling one?
you and your wife seem to have an interesting marriage

My wife thinks it's weird that I stare at the window during a heavy rainstorm. It would be a lot less weird if she'd just let me in.

do you want to use this or public service announcement for the vote?

As we have enough jokes, I'm going to put a poll up tomorrow.
So last chance if anyone wants to post one

Given the news yesterday (Nov 12) from the Philadelphia Mint,
some of the current administration's policies make no cents.

(From an old jokebook)

The Circus was in town. Lads who didn't have the price of admission stood outside the tent trying to look in. A passing businessman went to the ticket booth and said, "Let those boys in and count them."

Upon being told that the count was fourteen, the man said, "Shucks. Wrong again." And walked off.

Reminder: October is Procrastination Awareness Month

Stop buying plastic skeletons for Halloween. 🎃 It’s terrible for the environment.
Locally sourced, all natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly and cheaper. 💀 🦴

We have a winner!

For the last poll, Vote for you favourite Joke?
Congratulations to Cinnamon with her entry (Unknown post) with % of the vote.
Look out for a winner's token on your profile soon!

Imagine if your fridge did what you do to it everyday. Every half hour it goes to your room opens the door, stares at you for 5 minutes, then leaves.

A young lady was told that eating a pinch of gunpowder every day would help her live a long life. She followed this advice until the day she died at 103.
At her death she left behind 6 children, 12 grandchildren, 36 great-grandchildren, and a big hole where the crematorium used to be!